Thursday, May 28, 2015

Simple moments of beauty.

It's the simple moments of beauty. The sunsets. The stillness at twilight. It's sitting in the midst of this beauty and having a moment with God. These are the moments where I like to bring my broken hearts and simply give it to God. As I was reading old journal entry's of a couple months ago. I realized I had these moments where my faith was strong and God moved. Then I had moments where in my weakness and unworthiness God blessed me. He showed me He was faithful. Yet I seemed to let the broken hearts, the anger, the falls, And the bad days get the best of me. I seemed to forget all that the good shepherd provides. Why are we humans quick to let the joyous moments and the times of defeat effect us equally? These past couple of months have been hard. There have been moments of refinery and moments of blessing. I realized when we try to follow God but always look at how unworthy we are, we can never accomplish anything. We or I in this matter am so focused on the negative. I realize how unworthy I am. A couple weeks ago God blessed me beyond words. I was feeling unworthy and trying my best. My parents surprised me and took me to a concert. That night every little thing from getting there to the key words to in the songs blessed me. I knew that God was working in my heart and was moving. I realized its in those big moments of blessing where we can remember to thank God. Remember to live out life with gratitude. Living life in gratitude opens heart to Him. It's not letting the times of defeat effect us but letting Jesus write his beautiful story in our lives. 

Saturday, February 14, 2015

My Lover

On this fine Valentines Day I wanted to take a few moments and tell you about my love.

                     It has been four years since I have committed my love to you.
                     Since I have gone on this adventure with you My Love.
                                  You are gentle and Kind.
                     You never fail to give me grace when I mess up.
                                  You always hold my hand.
                                  Your love for me is genuine.
                    Your compliments to me are more than words can describe.
                   You help me believe in myself and be confident in who I am.
                   You don't want me to be like everyone else in this world.
                                  You inspire me to be different.
                                  You give me my passion to serve.
                                  You wash my feet so that I can wash others feet.
                                  Your security is all that I need.
                I know that you will provide when times are rough.
                You are willing to give up your life for me, so that no one can take me away from you.
                                  You protect me when harm is near.
               You give me confidence to help those who are hurting.
                                 You teach me how to love.
                                 You never break your promises.
                                 You help me dance when times are hard.
               You give me Joy when mourning is near.
               You help me see the world in a way I have never seen before.
                                You are patient when I wander off.
                And forgiving when I betray your/ our love.
                               You are my song.
                               You give me laughter.
                               You are my love.
Unlike most lovers, I am confident that I will spend eternity with you; lover of my soul.
This Love is not the  Love found in typical romance. It runs so much deeper than that.
On this Valentines Days here is to Jesus, My Savior; Lover of my Soul.


Saturday, February 7, 2015

The Importance of Being Women of God in Community.

"We have spoken freely to you, Corinthians, and opened wide our hearts to you. We are not with holding our affection from you, but you are withholding yours from us. As a fair exchange- open wide your hearts also." 2 Corinthians 6:11-12.

I have felt the pull in my heart to go on mission for God, but I did not know where to start. A lot of times when I try to say yes to God in this way I feel as if I just need to move to Africa or some foreign country and help those in need. Whenever I think of this worries start to flood my mind. Thinking about living in a foreign country makes me automatically assume that all my dreams and hopes will never come true. I know this is black mail from the devil. In the end I leave feeling more discouraged than ever. We need to start somewhere. Make one change at some point. As women when we are in the word and encouraging one another I know that God can use us in amazing ways. He has given us a caring motherly heart, he gives us strength to endure hard times so we can make a difference. Me by myself sure I can encourage others and lead worship, and be involved in the church. Sure God can still sure use that. What I don't have is the willingness to be vulnerable. To say 'Hey, life is not going to well, I don't have peace or I can't forgive,' or whatever it is that I'm going going through. The most important way we can do ministry is being a community. Community takes vulnerability. Now you hear community but what does that look like?  Community is meeting someone for coffee or getting a group from school, work, church, etc.. and digging deeper in God. It is making it available to who ever and letting God move. Letting Him take it to the places he has planned. I know when the emotions of life come it is important to have people to support and love and to do the same for others. This past week God has shown me that when I start something He will blesses it and take it to places I never could of imagined. It starts with willingness.

Saturday, January 31, 2015

Gift Count #6:Stand in awe of Him

My dear friends, Let us continue to count our blessings and in stand in awe of God. Whatever trials we may face today, we may not have another day to thank him for all we have.

"Much dreaming and many words are meaningless. Therefore stand in awe of God." Ecclesiastes 5:7. 

110. Excitement over the simple things.
111. Moments where you can learn something new.
112. Constant reminders that the Lord is here for me.
113. Starry nights.
114. Late night drives.
115. Encouraging words,
116. Coffee dates.
117. Dates with God.

118. Waiting for my someone.
119. Seeing myself the way God sees me.

120. Watching seeds grow,
121. Little sisters.

122. Nothing will ever stop the plans God has made.
123. Music to dance to.
124. Braids.
125. Chocolate.
126. Words that cut to the soul. (in good ways as well as bad.)
127. Meeting new people.
128. Best Friends.
129. Outdoor dinners.
130. Skirts to twirl in.
131. Flowers to plant.
132. Watching the sun rise in the midst of a broken heart and life.

Thursday, January 15, 2015

The Hard Truth About Worship.

This past year God has been showing me how imperfect the church is. How beautiful the church is because God has redeemed the church and we are his bride. One of the areas in the church that I think is  one of the most "sensitive" areas is worship. Worship is a way that we connect with God. It is our way of almost loving God back. A way where we can feel and know Gods love and grace for us. Worship is such a beautiful thing. Sometimes with all different denominations, generations, and different styles of worship the church can have different opinions. I've been on worship team at my church and now school for about three to four years. One thing I have noticed and I have struggled with is competition. I feel like as a church that is one of the biggest unspoken topics.  When you go to church every week or when your leading worship every week. It can sometimes become a routine. When it becomes a routine that is when we sometimes can loose sight of God. Worship becomes something that is  not about worshiping in spirit and in truth anymore but it becomes worshiping the songs. We start to either compare our church with other churches or if your on worship team you start to feel as if you should do this or have this. You should lead this song etc.. Honestly, everyone has probably had thoughts similar to this or even exactly like this.  This past summer God shattered my view of worship and has rebuilt it. The  real question is I can lead people into worship every week, but am I leading others into worship by the way I live? Do other people see the love of God in me and start to yearn and seek him. Worship is far greater from just an emotional experience. Sure God can touch us and heal us during worship. That should not be what makes us worship God. For me I never intentionally thought "I am going to worship God so I can feel him." But it started to become my heartset. That is when God reminded me I worship in Spirit and in Truth. If the emotional side is why we are worshiping then we will be led astray fast. Emotions are fleeting but the spirit of God and the Truth of God is a stronghold that will never lead us astray. Its this emotional yearning to be constantly in deep worship with God. Which is not bad. If we are not also grounded in the truth of God and in the Spirit of God then we will surely be led astray. Worship is an area where we don't always check our hearts. It is an area I know in my life that I have to check.

"Yet a time is coming and has now come when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and in truth, for they are the kind of worshipers the Father seeks. God is the spirit and his worshipers must worship in spirit and in truth." John 4:23-24.

So it does not matter how people worship around you or what worship song you're singing or leading. Our father will accept our worship when its grounded in Him. Ultimately when it comes to the bottom line that is what matters most.

Wednesday, December 31, 2014

A peace that shatters all.

"Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you, I do not give as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled  and do not be afraid." John 14:27

As the holiday season is slowly slipping away and a new year is charging towards us. Its hard to believe what another year will bring. From laughter and memories to pain and tragedies a new year means more adventure. More unexpected turns. As excited I am from what the Lord has planned. I am afraid. Afraid for pain. Afraid for sacrifice. Afraid for life. HIS peace shatters my fears. He comes in a shatters my fear like its a piece of glass.  If He is calling me to go risk my life. Sure fear will come but His peace is stronger. For the peace that the world brings is temporary and will die quickly in our fears. His peace knows the outcome. He knows that there is no need to fear. If your Creator who loves you and will only let good come out of every situation. If that Creator is holding you and giving you peace. Then surely His peace will shatter our fears. His peace will concur all. So if your excited, anxious, fearful or however you feel about 2015. Breath in His peace.

Friday, December 19, 2014

A Giving Heart

"For if the willingness is there, the gift is acceptable according to what one has, not according to what he does not have." 2 Corinthians 8:12. 

Every Christmas it seems like we are told to give. Whether were giving of our time, resources, or financially.This season is the season of giving. As I get older its been cool to see the little ways that I can give. Every year my family and I volunteer to ring the bell for the Salvation Army. Every year I've gone I never really knew how I was serving besides giving up my time to watch people give money. 
  This year God opened my eyes to see the beauty of giving. As people would put lose change in the kettle despite what they looked like or what backround they came from they were giving. Little kids would beg their parents to give so they could get a candy cane.  Not matter if there was an incentive their willingness to give was there. My job as a bell ringer is to smile and say 'Merry Christmas'. To acknowledge that they gave and to rejoice with them and with God. Not matter if they are saved or not God rejoices when His children are willing to give. He takes great delight in it. 

It reminds me of the widow that gave all they she had to God. It wasn't very much but Jesus delighted that she was willing to give in the midst of being poor. 
God reminded me of the wise men. Men who probably weren't Christ followers. Who traveled so they could give this King a gift. Though there reasons may of been not Christ oriented. Their willingness to give was there. God delighted in that. What they didn't know is that they honored the most important King. It was all because they were willing to give. To give of their time by following the star and give of their resources to honor Jesus. As we continue to give this Christmas. You don't have to give a huge amount of money or spend your whole break volunteering. God takes great delight in the simple and small ways you give this season. God does not care about the amount you give, but what you have to give and what he has put in your heart to give.