It's an ocean of the tempting pleasures of life. A tidal wave that wants to devour. A little taste here, a little drink there may not be so bad. It's the little steps that will eventually bring to this ocean. I have found myself wandering in circles. Trying to get away from this life but letting myself be devoured even more. I try to remind myself that I am truly statistied in Jesus. I bear the good fruit when I follow my Savior. I feel like I can live the life of pleasure and follow God. Why even bother going back. It's a mindset that's hard to lose. With no conviction there's no point. As I wander knowing I am saved by grace but hating the moment when I have to start all over. I realize that conviction starts when I truly start to choose Jesus. I have told myself and God that I would come back. It's just words with no meaning. We all have moments when falling seems a lot easier than trudging on. Falling gets us nowhere and trudging eventually gets us to the other side. We all are tested and tempted. We all will fall. I am reminded of this verse. "
He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit he prunes so that it will be even more fruitful. You are already clean because of the word I have spoken to you. Remain in me, as I also remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me." (John 15:2-4 NIV)Own of my pastors said that "God cares about our holiness more than our happiness." Even when we fall and getting back up is hard, when it hurts and giving up the world to follow Christ feels like the hardest thing. Know that bearing the fruit that we want to bear and being Joyful during trialsome times only comes when we remain in Christ. I am truly myself when I am in Christ.
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